Desert Sand Mica

Whatever, just crash it Bob...


I think all I have are random thoughts tonight

First off, the code is getting sooo deep, I am wondering if I will remember it myself. Some of it is fairly obvious to the person involved. But, coded so others that might know 'of it' (lol Jim) would probably not be able to figure it out. And some of it is so deep, its a code within a code. IS that giving it away? Hell no. I'm seriously having trouble keeping track of it myself. Damn, thats funny.

So, he comes over here and starts loading software on my masheen that i specifically said "Dont load that, I dont want it, I dont like it. " And explained my perfectly valid reasons for not liking it. A heated discussion ensues, his attitude being if he likes it then I should like it. Well, I dont. He finally said "fuck you" and loaded it anyway ! Cha. Seriously I was >thisclose< to really being offended. It's not him, per se. Its my machine. I dont think I trust anyone with my pc anymore. Even him. Or maybe especially him. I have everything 'just fucking so' and I dont want it screwed with. If I want something loaded, I'll load it. Hell, I can't even open napster and play a song on *his* machine without some sort of outburst. Anyway, the whole thing is comical. Again, it's not that it's any particular person, i just think I am passed the point of letting anyone ever touch my machine again. It's perfect. Cept for now I have this program on here that he loaded that i dont want.

Ok, the whole body odor thing that's been happening this week is just weird. It's totally infected my brain and I think about it way too much. Thank god no one knows what I am really talking about..god I love my danelle-code. Anyway..the whole obsession with it this week is amusing and disturbing at the same time. I actually am enamored with the whole thing. God, that is *so* incredibly weird.

I need someone to watch movies with. There are a lot of movies I want to see, and movies I want to see again, that I miss having someone to watch them with. I made a big list of movies all day at work as I thought of them, and then at the end of the day shut my machine down and didn't save the damn note. Not sure if it will still be there when I power up, it was on 'stickynotes'. Cha
I know I had on there: Simon Birch, Office Space, Clerks, High Fidelity, Menace II Society, and The Wall. I've never seen The Wall, and I really really want to. Feel like I'm saving that for Mark, for some reason. We've talked about it a lot.

Note to self - (danelle code, of course) Things that I know will make Ss think of what I want them to think about.
Movies - (TW, Mombrmb, CaWa-w)
Places - (SF, mgf, Ret...)
Music (DoJ, 3d, )
Wow, am trying to listen (DoJ), but it's hurting a little. Ooh, I just had to stop it. Man, funny how I can gauge my mood and attitude towards things by the music my heart will allow me to listen to. Funny how i could do it in the presence, but not alone. Wow. Ok, well that songs fucked now. It's my #2 favorite song right now and I can't listen to it. Great, just great.

Instead of looking for an ashtray when I need one, I look for a can. I need an ashtray but my eyes start darting around for a can. Some container with liquid in it so when you drop your butt you've been ashing on the floor for ten minutes into it, it will go out instead of sit and smolder. Then pretty soon the whole room is full of the grossest smelling smoke, and you have to get up and put liquid into the container that you dropped your butt into, cause now it's almost on fire. I am going to quit smoking. Very, very soon.

HTML code is soooo weird. It's like a little guy that pretends to be your really cool friend and then stabs you in the back. The tiniest of errors causes a mass corruption of everything you know and love. It strikes fear into the heart of novice users. It's so moody, so unpredictable. It's sneaky and makes you constantly suspicious, that something is about to go terribly wrong.

Where is everyone, anyway? It's only midnight and the place is deserted. It's been so much MC at this time every night that when they're not here, it's like a ghost town. lol

I have gotten into remixes lately. Ever since BN I have gotten into this weird music. Dance, Techno, Remixes. I wish I knew more good stuff to look for, but I dont know what anything is called! The music is so subjective. If I am in a good mood, it is the greatest. If I am in a bad mood, It perks me up. You cannot sit still while it is playing. It's amazing the amount of alternative versions of songs are out there and most people dont even know it. However, I have noticed that a remix of a song that was originally recorded as a dance or techno song seems pointless, and it never comes out sounding good.

What am I gonna do about MrLD. He'll be in Houston next week, that's still too far. When we first 'met' he was coming to denver all the time, and now ppfftt. The whole thing is just so boggling, mostly because of the 24/38 deal. If that number were different, I think things would seem a lot more urgent.

RC is already gone, I found out today. Wrote him an email hoping I would get to talk to him at least on the phone before he left, but plans changed. Now it's 6/6-11. Not good odds on seeing him then, probably. That seriously bums me out.

The end of May and beginning of June is going to be very busy I think. I'm wiggling into this routine now and remembering when I was gone every night is daunting. lol I'm ready for being alone at the very end of the night. Some company now and then would be very nice however. I just cant see being true to myself right now and entertaining the one on one scenario. The one-on-none scene has it's benefits, too. Depends on the day you ask me.

Hmm...I think I'm done.


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