Desert Sand Mica

Whatever, just crash it Bob...

3.18.2002

I like Email. I loove Email. Send me mail, lots of mail I love it. But don't send me this crap. If you are getting this drivel in your email, please don't forward it on to me. And if you're originating this stuff? Shame on you.

The message is timeless, certainly. Be wary of strangers. Fine. We learned that already. In Kindergarten...

Read on, please.


*****
The derogatory comments are mine, in italics.

Subject: Warning, Smart Gal Here

About a month ago there was a woman standing by the mall entrance passing out flyers to all the women going in. The woman had written the flyer herself to tell about an experience she had, so that she might warn other women.

riiight.

The previous day, this woman had finished shopping, went out to her car and discovered that she had a flat. She got the jack out of the trunk and began to change the flat. A nice man dressed in a business suit and carrying a briefcase walked up to her and said, "I noticed you're changing a flat tire. Would you like me to take care of it for you?" The woman was grateful for his offer and accepted his help.

like *that* ever happens...I was stranded with a flat on I-25, Christmas Eve in a snowstorm with children in the car once. No one stopped.

They chatted amiably while the man changed the flat, and then put the
flat tire and the jack in the trunk, shut it and dusted his hands off. The woman thanked him profusely, and as she was about to get in her car, the man told her that he left his car around on the other side of the mall, and asked if she would mind giving him a lift to his car. She was a little surprised and she asked him why his car was on the other side.

Who cares why? *I'm* not taking him.

He explained that he had seen an old friend in the mall that he hadn't seen for some time and they had a bite to eat and visited for awhile; he got turned around in the mall and left through the wrong exit, and now he was running late and his car was clear around on the other side of the mall. The woman hated to tell him "no" because he had just rescued her from having to change her flat tire all by herself, but she felt uneasy.

He can change a tire in a business suit but he can't find his way out of a mall?

Then she remembered seeing the man PUT HIS BRIEFCASE IN HER TRUNK before shutting it and before he asked her for a ride to his car.

dunt dunt duunnnttt

She told him that she'd be happy to drive him around to his car, but she just remembered one last thing she needed to buy. She said she would only be a few minutes; he could sit down in her car and wait for her; she would be as quick as she could be. She hurried into the mall, and told a security guard what had happened; the guard came out to her car with her, but the man had left.

What a surprise.

They opened the trunk, took out his locked briefcase and took it down to the police station. The police opened it. What they found was rope, duct tape, and knives.

Rope, duct tape and knives? Oh my!

When the police checked her "flat" tire, there was nothing wrong with it; the air had simply been let out. It was obvious what the man's intention was, and obvious that he had carefully thought it out in advance.

The Horror

I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life.

uh huh.

A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle.

Wha?

PLEASE BE SAFE AND NOT SORRY! JUST A WARNING TO ALWAYS BE ALERT AND USE YOUR HEAD!!!

Gotcha.

Never let your guard down.

I got it, I said.

*******

Sheesh...

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