Doo bee doo doo wop. Why am I saying that? I have no idea. It's been a pretty decent weekend. The lunch thing turned out to be pretty much nada. Friend of a friend. Homely, Im told. Then there was V-mail and I dont mean voicemail. Had me worried, but then there was more and all is redeemed. I cant explain. All I can say is "never again?" "never?" PROMISE!?!?!?. Malcolm knows. lol God, this code must be infuriating! lol.

Malcolm told me that spending christmas alone was unacceptable. then so did Mark. I guess Im not worried anymore.

What am I worried about? Fucking money. Money sucks right now, and there's no improvement in sight. Dan is paying only his 140 a month for kt's child support, nothing for Daniel yet. We have a hearing November 15, but he is already bitching wildly. What is it with these fucking men that doent want to carry their fair share? He dumped Daniel off 3 months ago and has seen him twice in person since then. The whole situation is just fuct.

I am watching a show about waitresses in Vegas, and how their feet are all fucked up from the shoes they have to wear. Also, the neck and shoulder problems that they have from carrying trays. Im not sure why Im watching it. I think to prove to myself that I can watch something about Las Vegas without being melancholy and weird. this woman has filed a lawsuit against her casino for her medical problems. It must have sucked having a gun held to your head while you served all those gamers.

I took all my fingernails off till I can afford to keep them up again. It'll be soon. Something really really disturbing happened with one of my nails last week, and I cant stop thinking about it. I cant write about it cause it's really really weird, and bothersome, and I'm trying to not think about it. How fucking cryptic and annoying can I be, I wonder? I only write about this weird shit to remind myself about it later, not to torture you all, I promise.

Had a pretty fun Saturday today. Took Emma to a punkin p atch, which she loved. the pumpkins were outrageously priced tho, so we only got a couple of little ones. Emma loved the one with the curly top. It is of course named "curly" now. We also went to WalMart and to the Breakfast Inn. Yummy. Last night we went to this weird little BBQ place that was full of black people, which I took as a good sign. It's always a good sign when a chinese restaurant is full of asians, and mexican restaurants are full of mexicans, get the picture? it was good BBQ, Mark thought it was skimpy. We had a coupon..of course.

Tomorrow I guess we're just going to be lazy and then make some stew in the evening. Scrummy, as Emma would say. I keep calling her Emma Pastrami and she says "Im not Emma bastrani". Then she giggles. God, she kills me.

Mark is in the bedroom watching Enterprise. Blech. Im drinking beer and wishing I had shibby!