Desert Sand Mica

Whatever, just crash it Bob...


Mark is reading "Bunny Trouble" to Emma for bed. Truly priceless. It's the cutest story about bunnies that get into trouble around Easter Time. (How timely!) The main character's name is Ralph, which Emma was quick to point out was also her big toe's name. (Doesn't your big toe have a name?)

She loves this book. It was Daniel's favorite, and nearly the only book of his I kept. Funny that moms save their kids favorite books. I guess "readers" do that.

We need to dye eggs tomorrow. Hope it doesn't "freak her out".

Fajitas. mmm.

BSh is looming. Im so excited I could just shit. It's so close! whee.


Blah blah blah. Tore a contact yesterday, now my eyes are even more fucked up than usual.

I've been thinking about maybe looking for a new job. Im really very very irritated at driving and paying to park downtown. I went through the want-ads yesterday and didn't see much, but I am going to keep looking. I'd really like to find something close to home.

Things are going amazingly well. Very nice and even, close. Fun. Always the potential hammer looming overhead, but I think it's secure for now. Who knows.

Daniel is receiving tutoring 4 days a week, Im so happy about that. Katie is working hard, and Megan just got a job at Applebee's with her, very cool. Hopefully that will mean less running back and forth for me, I get so tired of that. Saturdays are the worst, she works a split shift, so it's back and forth, back and forth, all day. bleh.

I took Friday off, and Monday was a city holiday, so this is my first day back to work since Thursday. Gail is here, we are kind of just staying out of each other's hair and getting things done. I have a lot going on at work, so it's much easier if she just lets me be. Am I an idiot for wanting to look for something else? Is this as good as it gets?

I feel pukey (actually did pukey a couple of times this morning) so Im just trying to get through the day.


My eyes are so fucked up. I need to see whats going on. Every morning they are so blurry. Is it my blood sugar? My vision? bleh. Im falling apart.

Last night was very interesting. A drive at 2am, (no, not me) then nothing else. Thinking, busy. I guess it's ok. I was surprisingly blah-zay about it. Weird tho. Let's go to bed. great. Oh, you're leaving? ok. later.

Makes me again very grateful to be among the well employed. I make great money and have 5 weeks vaca a year. Let's be happy to be on a payroll. I should have a review and hopefully a raise coming up very soon. If I get the max (shouldnt be a problem) that will put me at just around 34K a year. Doable, long as my taxes dont go nuts as a result. I have job security and my job is pretty damn fun. Can I ask for much more? I don't think so.


I like Email. I loove Email. Send me mail, lots of mail I love it. But don't send me this crap. If you are getting this drivel in your email, please don't forward it on to me. And if you're originating this stuff? Shame on you.

The message is timeless, certainly. Be wary of strangers. Fine. We learned that already. In Kindergarten...

Read on, please.

The derogatory comments are mine, in italics.

Subject: Warning, Smart Gal Here

About a month ago there was a woman standing by the mall entrance passing out flyers to all the women going in. The woman had written the flyer herself to tell about an experience she had, so that she might warn other women.


The previous day, this woman had finished shopping, went out to her car and discovered that she had a flat. She got the jack out of the trunk and began to change the flat. A nice man dressed in a business suit and carrying a briefcase walked up to her and said, "I noticed you're changing a flat tire. Would you like me to take care of it for you?" The woman was grateful for his offer and accepted his help.

like *that* ever happens...I was stranded with a flat on I-25, Christmas Eve in a snowstorm with children in the car once. No one stopped.

They chatted amiably while the man changed the flat, and then put the
flat tire and the jack in the trunk, shut it and dusted his hands off. The woman thanked him profusely, and as she was about to get in her car, the man told her that he left his car around on the other side of the mall, and asked if she would mind giving him a lift to his car. She was a little surprised and she asked him why his car was on the other side.

Who cares why? *I'm* not taking him.

He explained that he had seen an old friend in the mall that he hadn't seen for some time and they had a bite to eat and visited for awhile; he got turned around in the mall and left through the wrong exit, and now he was running late and his car was clear around on the other side of the mall. The woman hated to tell him "no" because he had just rescued her from having to change her flat tire all by herself, but she felt uneasy.

He can change a tire in a business suit but he can't find his way out of a mall?

Then she remembered seeing the man PUT HIS BRIEFCASE IN HER TRUNK before shutting it and before he asked her for a ride to his car.

dunt dunt duunnnttt

She told him that she'd be happy to drive him around to his car, but she just remembered one last thing she needed to buy. She said she would only be a few minutes; he could sit down in her car and wait for her; she would be as quick as she could be. She hurried into the mall, and told a security guard what had happened; the guard came out to her car with her, but the man had left.

What a surprise.

They opened the trunk, took out his locked briefcase and took it down to the police station. The police opened it. What they found was rope, duct tape, and knives.

Rope, duct tape and knives? Oh my!

When the police checked her "flat" tire, there was nothing wrong with it; the air had simply been let out. It was obvious what the man's intention was, and obvious that he had carefully thought it out in advance.

The Horror

I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life.

uh huh.

A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle.




Never let your guard down.

I got it, I said.



Oh man, is someone fucking with me? Really paranoid. Lots to be paranoid about. God.

I am sitting here typing while having a critical moments conversation. Could be that way until everything is rightful owner-ed. So my thoughts are just between waiting for the words.

Nothing. That's a long time.


Gail's mom passed away Friday night, so now we are faced with another week Directorless. The first week was kind of laid back and breezy, now I am a little worried. She wants me to check her voice mail and start calling people back, etc. There are a lot of important things this week, DeeDee's letter, Development announcement, and Board packets. All three nearly equally as daunting. Time to get serious, I think.

Today is St. Patrick's Day. Whee.

Last night Mark and I were sitting around at 9pm, looking at what was on tv. We realized everything that was on TV was Irish related because of St Paddy's Day. Mark said.."we should have gone out for a beer, c'mon,,,let's go." Um..ok. We went to Sheabeen and had the best time. They had these two guys singing sing-a-long Irish and Scottish songs, and then around 11:30 p.m. The Michael Collins Pipe and Drum Band came in. Really cool. There were about 20 bagpipe players and a bunch of drummers. Very talented, very cool to watch.

The place was packed, so another couple invited us to sit down and oh man. They were complete psychos. Augustina and Phil. Not married yet Phil said. Eek. This woman was so..god I dont even know how to describe her. She was delusional, for the most part. She thought the guillotine was invented and used in Ireland. Then she went on and on about Holland. Im not sure what about. And the Blarney Stone. Good lord, she just didn't get it.. Phil was real blue collar, but surprisingly cultural adept. He knew alot about things that most Americans don't have a clue about. But man, that woman was a damn weirdo.

Guess that's it. Sunday-night-I-dont-wanna-go-to-work-tomorrow-mode.

Six Feet Under was awesome tonight.


Hmm. SO many hmms.

Gails mom is at death's door, knockin we are the Directorless Friends Foundation. Everything is moving along quiet smoothly, and we have collectively decided that we can function Directorless indefinately. We all come in at 10, and leave by 3... But hey, things are still getting done.

Some good words coming out, that are encouraging. Lots of need everywhere. I guess that's good. But then it makes you think.."ok, and all this giving is for... what again?"

Emma is doing this weird little mouth thing when she pouts. She keeps her lips together and moves her bottom jaw side to side. Last night she pooped her pants again . (She's been potty training since Christmas - *exhale) She had to stop watching her movie, and sit and do nothing for a while. She really didn't seem to give a rat's ass, cept for that pouty mouth thing.

It's cold and snowy and I think I'll leave. Sheesh, it's nearly 3 already.

Why isn't she talking to me? So weird. Not that it's a devastating loss or anything, but the friendship was kinda nice. I must be missing something. He says I'm not, and that it's typical. ok. *shrug*.


An Emma quote:

"Have you seen any squirrels around here tonight?"


Ack, I have too many windows open.

Ok, let's see. What is going on. Everyone is still laid off, and that seems to be the big dark cloud over everything and everyone. I tried to mention it, but was rebuffed. Not much else to say about all of that. I feel like I'm skrimping by, but am grateful to be working anywhere at this point.

I have got to get over to fragmented's blog (left) and see what is going on. Last I knew she was just a day or two from moving. Wonder what's up with her crazy mom.

I'm reading Angela's Ashes. About 4 years behind everyone else. It's so good, I'm almost done and dreading the end. I've heard its sad, I can only imagine. Gail says I have to read the sequel right after I finish this one. I'm rationing the book. I always read less when I'm almost at the end, trying to stretch it out.

Katie said there was a woman in her restaurant the other night with Tourette's Syndrome. Said she kept screamin FIRE!!. And then apologizing to everyone. Another guy asked kt "Is she saying "Fire?!" kt says "Yea, she has Tourette's." The guy say's "Oh man, I heard her in the grocery store the other night!". Crazy!

I'm going to post some other stuff later..but here's this. I thought it was funny. She's so... tight.

Danelle: im down loading your dumb sinatra
Amanda: yeah!
Danelle: he's stupid
Amanda: you're stupid
Danelle: why do you like it?
Amanda: it makes me dance around in my chair
Amanda: and snap my fingers
Danelle: dumb.
Amanda: i like songs that make you snap
Danelle: there's a lot of cool songs that make you snap
Danelle: not I did it myyyy waaayyyy
Amanda: I know
Amanda: i want "I get a kick out of Love"
Danelle: i get a kick out of you
Amanda: haha
Danelle: no, idiot. thats what its called
Amanda: damn it, I have to do my online classes over spring break, they don't "break"
Danelle: oh that sucks
Amanda: that's not fair
Danelle: waaaa
Amanda: whatever, this class is so hard
Danelle: what is it
Amanda: english, she gives us so much work
Danelle: oh. well she prolly thinks you're getting off easy cos its online
Danelle: just tell her f u
Danelle: lol
Amanda: hahahaha
Danelle: tell her you dont need english cos you arent going to england
Amanda: okay
Amanda: I want Drowning too
Danelle: im listening to I get a kick out of you
Danelle: im snappin
Amanda: you like it
Danelle: i get a ....kick...yes!
Danelle: boopee doo wop
Danelle: no i dont like it
Amanda: see, you just have to snap
Danelle: no, i just have to turn it off and put on some puddle of mudd
Danelle: "She f*ckin hates me!"
Amanda: mom, that's naughty
Danelle: naughty?
Danelle: im naughty? well i was quoting
Amanda: okay
Danelle: if you're quoting its ok
Amanda: yeah, I'm sure you're always quoting when you say that
Danelle: now im listening to "they cant take that away from me"
Danelle: its a snapper too
Danelle: makes me want a martini or something
Amanda: well I have to do my homework. you have to stop talking
Amanda: okay, i'll talk to you later
Amanda: okay?
Danelle: ssh. im done talking. love you
Amanda: haha love you, bye
Danelle: *wink
Amanda: *wink